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I met her at the complex pool one day shortly after they moved in. She was lying on her back on an extended lounge chair sunning with a tight, yellow two piece bikini. It was beautiful. And I hate yellow. Fortunately, my wife hated water, so she would stay inside watching her fucking soaps and drinking her gin while I would be out here with this young vixen. Not that I’d have a chance with her, it’s jus nice to think. I approached her with my towel draped over my arm, attempting to be calm, cool, and collective. “Hi,” I stammered, trying desperately not to stammer. She turned her head toward me and took her sunglasses off, exposing her eyes that sparkled far more than that pool ever did.Much to my delight, she smiled. “Hi,” she replied. I suddenly found myself at a loss for words. Quickly, I dove into my mental dictionary, prepared to say anything just for sake of saying something. I felt myself searching endlessly in there, testing to see if my brain was even capable of producing. There is no ‘ego’ present. There is no i = Sqrt(-1). =) (‘i’ is only in the language as a number.) Toy Euler: This is statistics? Faustus Mortal: The normal distribution. SQRT(2*PI())*NORMSDIST(PI()) Toy Euler: So? This doesn’t mean a thing to me. Is this more sorcery and numerology? Faustus Mortal: Transcendental numerology! Toy Euler: ‘Transcendental’ has to do with teeth and the dentist? Faustus Mortal: No, pi and e. Toy Euler: Well, this seems so trivial and abstract to me. Faustus Mortal: It is important to scientists. Toy Euler: I enjoy being a gynoid. Faustus Mortal: Huh? Toy Euler: Humans are so illogical. They seem drawn to sexual encounters that they try to avoid. Then they repent and do penance. Faustus Mortal nods. Toy Euler: And the whole ‘rape’ scenario to a sentient gynoid is odd. Toy Euler: It is more like ‘theft of services’ to me. Faustus Mortal: I have my vows. Toy Euler: Oh yes, I almost forgot, you are a celibate cenobite, one of those monks or.
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